Ten Days with Animals Part 2 – Sri Racha Tiger Zoo

Continuing on with my nine day adventurepade, our school took a field trip with the M1s (the equivalent of 7th graders and the main grade that I teach) to the Sri Racha Tiger Zoo. You’re probably wondering if this is THE Sri Racha – where the sauce is made – and I’m proud to say that YES, it could very well be that place, since it has the same name as the sauce. I have no idea, though. I didn’t ask.

The trip started with the teachers getting on board the bus full of students. There was a caravan of thirteen buses leaving the school (One for each of the twelve M1 classes and 1 for the EP kids) and we foreigners sat on the bus with the English Program students.

I’ve been seeing buses around Thailand with swirls of color and poorly painted Dragonball Z characters, playing loud music and I’ve wondered what they’re for: I received my answer. Our bus had Naruto drawings on it and the first song that started bumpin once we got on was Celine Dion’s My Heart Will Go On.

Just kidding. It was Gangnam Style.

Naruto says "Welcome."

Naruto says “Welcome.”

Police escort cause we roll presidentially.

Police escort cause we roll presidentially.

After an hour and a half-ish of bass and drums and Thai music and the kids dancing like it was the last night of their lives, we got to the zoo. Here come the pictures:

The kids getting prepped to terrorize some unsuspecting animals.

The kids getting prepped to terrorize some unsuspecting animals.

The zoo's schedule. I've learned to stop asking questions.

Me and a small tiger/large house cat.

Me and a small tiger/large house cat.

They went on to stick pretty much every body part into the crocodile's mouths.

They went on to stick pretty much every body part into the crocodile’s mouths.

An intimate moment.

An intimate moment.

Me and mah boys. They mock me every time I do a thumbs up so I hit 'em wit the deuces. And they were all smiling right before this picture was taken, I swear.

Me and mah boys. They mock me every time I do a thumbs up so I hit ’em wit the deuces.

So we went to an elephant show. They elephants did some cool stuff, then the trainers asked for two volunteers. I figured it would be another elephant massage like in Kanchanaburi, so I was down. I raised my hand, got picked, walked down like a boss and got my massage.

Then tragedy struck.

There’s a video on Facebook that captures it better, but the host let the other volunteer leave and kept me for part two, where they strapped me to a board, but three balloons next to me (one under each armpit and one between the legs. Of course.) and showed off of their elephant’s dart-throwing skills. It was pretty cool; he would lift the oversized metal darts above his head with his trunk then launch them forward. The only weird thing was that the elephant REALLY SUCKED AT THROWING DARTS. He hit 1 out of 4, then they were like, “Alright, let’s do this.”

They blindfold me (which I was actually pretty thankful for cause then I wouldn’t have to watch the dart smash through my glasses and eyeball and brains) and the elephant goes to work. I can’t see anything, but I hear the announcer count “1….2….3!” each time, then I hear a pop shakes with the force of the dart and I hear a popping balloon. This happens three times and I, somehow, walk away unscathed.

Yolk’s on me, though, cause I later found out that they brought out a different, sober elephant while I was blindfolded and he actually popped the balloons from point-blank rather than fifteen meters away. Haha. Haha. Ha.

Moses

What I’m reading: The Once and Future King by T.H. White

What I’m Writing: …I don’t know really. A mix of grad stuff and continuing to work on my novel. And songs! Writing songs.

What I’m Listening To: Creul Summer by G.O.O.D Music

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